sometimes i start to feel really thin. then, I stop getting on facebook for like a week and I feel all better again. :)
i've been doing a shit job at taking pictures. its that same thin feeling except apparently this one lasts more than a week. yikes.
christmas spirit has been lacking this year. not really excited about much.
{maybe something to do with a recent break up of what I thought was going to be a really fun relationship and it just went down the crapper? One of the hardest things to do is breakin up with someone without one specific REASON, just that, you know its for the better. You know that you're being worked over and as much as you want to stay in it and remember what it used to be like because you know how much fun it could be and you WANT it to be, but its not anymore. And quite frankly the other voice in the relationship doesn't give you one sliver of a feeling that they want the same thing too. Why did he do that?! How come you lead me to believe....? Argh. Sheer frustration. and serious disappointment and well just plain BUMMED OUT. Sadness all around really. I thought you an awesome person the more I go to know you and just thought that the world was yours for the taking; you were a doll but then something changed and you took that praise and left me behind deer in the headlights. Since when did you get too good to be in this relationship? HAH. And quit telling me how I should pursue Law School and shouldn't have given that up for you. OH SCREW YOU. SCREW YOU. Thanks for supporting me. That's just what I want from you, more criticism. All I want is someone to go camping with, watch a funny movie, check out a concert maybe, and hang with friends. I'll go to Law School if I want to go to Law School and I only told your parents I applied because I was making fucking conversation over breakfast. You're going to pick up a book someday, or you're going to hear someone speak my name in conversation, and you'll wonder. This hurts. I miss your attention. But, I don't miss the way you made me feel. } get off my back. and if you're sorry, trust me, not nearly as much as i am. :(
so, for the rest of the entry I already had written...
forget it. another day. maybe later tonight.
5 comments
Sorry to hear that girly, because Amy does rock. Hope all else is well with you, here I am admitting that I blog stalk you, but thats what blogs are for right?
The right camping/concert/funny movie buddy will come along someday. Until then keep up your awesome adventures that I'm super jealous of and stay true to what makes you happy, because that is all that matters!
he doesn't deserve someone like you, that's what i think. if he did, he would have known better. i love you.
thanks guys... :) (sheepish smile) thank you
Amy...
I hear all you are saying... come be a bitter prude like me, 4 years and running ;-)!
It just means that something is out there that is so much better than that thing. It could be another person, it could be another thing but SOMETHING is going to come and then you'll wonder "what was I thinking, what did I ever do before this because this... this is amazing!"
You live and you learn and you move on to something better.
Loves...
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